Raising Children without Bias: How to Unlearn Racism So You Dont Limit Your Childrens Potential By: Deb Capone
Don Imus ridicules remarks directed at the Rutgers University womens basketball team coupled with the Korean governments concern that the horrific actions of a Korean-American at Virginia Tech would spark backlash against Koreans has put racism on the front line. These unfortunate events forced us all to face the state of racism and its repercussions for our children. We are now forced to: Relinquish the fantasy that racism doesnt exist or its better than it used to be. Recognize that racism has serious consequences. Admit that if we cant raise our children without biases and racist attitudes then we are limiting their potential. This really is good news. Now we can start unlearning our bad habits of racism and bias. Racism is a habit. Its something we learned. And what can be learned can also be unlearned. It takes time, effort and commitment. But, it is do-able. Experts believe that it takes as long as 30 days to break a simple habit like the order your put your shoes on in the morning. So unlearning your racism habits may take some work. Dont expect overnight results. Take things step-by-step and day-by-day-starting now. Heres how… 4 Steps to Unlearning Racism & Raising Confident Children in the 21st Century: Step 1: Take the power out of racism. Talk about it openly. We actually talk about race all the time, but we do it in code. Much of our discussions about everyday life-politics, education, welfare, taxes and even movies, entertainers, sports and neighborhood happenings have racial underpinnings. Racism, like any ism gets more power when we dont talk about it openly. First, admit that racism exists in todays society as recent events clearly demonstrate. Then we can make the issue less scary by getting racism out of its closet and talking about it openly. Step 2: Decode the codes of racism To take the emotion and power out of racism, we have to understand what we are really saying. Consider the words terrorist and illegal alien as an example of code words. Has terrorist become a code word for people of Arab decent that hides anti-Arab sentiments? Illegal aliens simply dont exist. There are people living in the United States that dont have the proper documentation to enter the US. But they themselves are not illegal. How can people be illegal? Todays illegal aliens are likely to be from Mexico which begs the question of what are we truly worried about-the legal or racial implications of our immigration policies? It wouldnt be the first time that racialist sentiments have been masked in legalities. Step 3: Focus on the end result. Racism can only exist where there is ignorance and fear. Examine your values and beliefs when you consider those who are different from you. Then educate yourself where need be and demonstrate your willingness to learn and explore different cultures, races and religions to your children. If you can replace your biases and prejudices with facts, your children will garner real intercultural competence. And, only then will they be armed to face the 21st century with confidence. You will be arming them with one of the most important tools for their success in the world. Step 4: Dont just stand there-do something. If you hear a racist joke, ask the jokester to cease and desist. If a high profile person crosses the line, then write a letter or make a phone call. Make a commitment to examine your own isms and stop them or your childrens sake if not your own. Admit that you can be wrong about people and live the possibility that you can make the world more tolerant, more accepting, and more respectful. Give your children a major key to success-the focus on humankind and not just our own kind. No one is born with racism. It is a learned set of beliefs and values, which believe it or not can be unlearned. It is up to all of us to make sure that our children dont become a poster child for racism when they inherit the world.
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Deb Capone, President and CEO of as Simple as That, and the author of three award-winning childrens books helps parents and educators simply www.endbullyingtoday.com>end bullying, bias and racism. For more FREE information and articles on overcoming bias and creating a cultural diverse future for our children, check out Debs new blog at: www.bullyeraser.blogspot.com>bullyeraser.blogspot.com
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